I've been dilly dathering around my work today... And after the heart shed of last night and realising how good my GOOD friends are I sat in a computer room with one of them and tried to work.. I was hoping to get 1000 words churned out. Managed about 400 so far. I guess If i can do another 650 I'll be happy. But of course the kitchen needs cleaning and my bed needs making before I can even think about that.
Boy called. He actually seemed really enthusiastic to talk to me, which makes a change. A nice change. But he always only talks to me for 10 minutes.. the amount of time which he says all he can think to say. I think i'm feeling a lot of pempted up resentment toward him. What he's doing is perfectly normal, but i'm finding a reason to not like him for it. He asks why I'm not sure I want to goto dinner on my 21st anymore.. He asks how the work is, how I am... and my answers are all very much in the category of "meh". I resent him for being so happy when he doesnt accept where he is in his life. He's 21, lives at home, goes to college, doesnt grasp the difference between there their and they're.. which for some reason winds me up. I dont know. I feel like I'm dating a 15 yr old who looks up to me as if i'm something from the magazines.. I'm only what he should be.. what he COULD be.. I resent that he's missed the oppertunity to do something that I'm pretty sure he wants to do. He's never going to leave Weymouth now. But why should such petty things bother me so much? He's funny, and kind, and strong and attractive and healthy. My God he's so much more capable to live his life than my previous boyfriend, yet i put up with him for 18 months!! Now I'm with dan I dont even know how that previous relationship lasted longer than 3 weeks! SO WHY AM I SO UNHAPPY?
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